11 Waiting
Get used to waiting for your wife to get ready, guys. If you add up all of the time you wait for your wife, it'll probably add up to years. Years.
Article Continues after the joke
We went to see a movie the other night.
We went to see a movie the other night.
I sat in an aisle seat as I usually do because it feels a little roomier.
Just as the feature was about to start, a blonde from the center of the row got up and started working her way out.
“Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me, gotta hurry, oops, excuse me.”
By the time she got to me, I was trying to look around her and I was a little impatient, so I said, “Couldn’t you have done this a little earlier?”
“No!” she said in a loud whisper. “The ‘TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE PLEASE’ message just flashed up on the screen and mine is in the car.”
12 Women Are Psychopaths
Nothing will ever prepare you for how much psychological warfare women are capable of waging on their husbands. If you don't go insane, it will be a miracle.
13 The Truth
This image is not as glamorous as most people imagine their married lives to be. But this is the truth. This is what your life will be like. Get used to it.
14 Marriages Today
Today, we socialize with our partners by sitting side by side and going on the computer for hours every day. It's sad, but god damn its true. We spend more time looking at a computer screen than into the eyes of our loved ones.
